'I'm fine, Don't worry!'
Hm .. I swear SOMETIMES, I don't really mean it, only just because I don't want anyone else to worry. Normal and nothing different, ain't it? I know.
But there's something that I need to ask myself.
Why can't my body & mind just agree and go along with what I say?!
Like when I say 'I'm fine', I want to mean it all the time! Because I want to be 'fine'! So I don't have these negative thoughts that'll float on the top of my head and haunt me for the rest of my time. I don't frikkin want that. -.-'
Yet ... it's so hard. The heart gets too emotional..Well that's a problem. But i REALLY, and TRULY want to be in good condition mentally. Reason: I rather help and dedicate into helping others than myself.
Hm, the problem is that, usually, you help yourself to be able to help others. Though, there are people out there that are able to help others and still have problems. Unfortunately, I'm not like that, as I get too emotional. It pisses the crap out of me when I'm in a horrible state of mind while there are many close/good friends I want to help! But nooooooo... my heart just like to get a bit TOO emotional with my OWN situation and go ASDFGHJKL.
arghh, screw myself. That's why sometimes I see myself as 'weak'. Though there are some particular people that MAY read this blog and plan to kill me the next day... o___o' ...
~ ..
BUT !! ..
Even though I can get my bad moments in me, I just want to thank my close/good friends for being there for me :D. As I am able to express my problems and usually forget them because of you guys. Which of course, is a good thing!
I also thank everyone that surrounds me, as you guys still make a difference my life! It's just interesting that even one life, it can still affect you, no matter how tiny the action was, IT STILL MAKES A DIFFERENCE! :DDD !! ( of course I mean this positively hehe, just to note just incase xD)
^
Anyways, excuse my weirdness... as my mind thinks funnily.
I just find it funny(weird) how I went from a negative to a postive post ... oh wells. hehe :3